EXTREME UPKEEP

I have been on this earth for five decades and have never witnessed the narcissistic and self-involved behavior that I see in our culture today.  I grew up in a small village in Ohio with rather blurred class lines.  There were 32 (?) students in my graduation class and the general consensus among us was that we were all in it together, for better or worse, richer or poorer.  We were a tight knit bunch.  I was the overweight girl who used her wit and humor to her advantage.  I feel I was generally liked by most, ignored by some, and very close with enough different "groups" of friends that I rarely sat at home on a Friday or Saturday night.  Not because I was dating, mind you, but out and about at a basketball game, the movies, or just "cruising". 

Because my hometown was so tiny, everyone was privy to just about everyone's business.  What I do not remember about my formative years was my mother (or any of my friend's mothers) fretting because it was time for a manicure or pedicure.  I'm not sure that any of us even knew that such a thing existed.  Have someone paint your nails for you or (God forbid) see your feet?  Why in the world would my mother spend her factory salary or me my babysitting money on something that Sally Hansen could do for us?  It would have been unfathomable.  Facials?  Say what?  Why, if you had half a brain you had Noxema under the sink and washed your face before you went to bed.  We wore Cover Girl makeup, used Great Lash mascara and Bonne Bell lip balm that came in a tube so big that you lost it before you ever used it all.  It was the 70's and life was free and easy.

Of course, hair was in a category all it's own and all bets were off when it came to plunking down the dollars.  I was always on the lookout for the miracle shampoo and creme rinse (yep, creme rinse) that would transform my tresses into a bouncy, shiny irresistible mass of silk like beauty.  I remember using Clairol Herbal Essence Shampoo, Body on Tap (which professed to have beer in it), Farrah Fawcett shampoo, and my all time favorite "Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific".  We used curling irons and an array of barrettes and combs.  I personally succumbed to cutting my long, parted in the middle hair into a "wing cut", meaning that I then had bangs that were swept back on either side of my face.  So cool.

Fast forward to today's culture.  "Manis" and "pedis" are de rigour for an extremely large segment of our population.  Children routinely get them.  Spas have popped up everywhere.  I hear co-workers talk about getting facials and massages.  I have had a handful of manicures and one pedicure in my lifetime.  I started getting my brows done every few months because I was getting old lady eyebrows and that just wouldn't do.  But for the most part, this is all foreign to me.  What strikes me is that so many people today find what I see as completely optional to be an absolute necessity.  A young co-worker was complaining about the cost of keeping up her acrylic nails.  I suggested that she go au naturel for a change.  She gasped..."What!  I've had these since high school!"  Never mind that your water bill goes past due, the nails MUST be immaculate. 

Maybe I am just jealous.  I am a divorcee with a son in college.  There is no room in my budget (and I use that term loosely) for what I consider to be extreme upkeep.  I paint my own fingers and toes and color my hair from a box.  I wear drug store (even Dollar Tree) makeup.  I am excited beyond belief when I get enough CVS extra bucks to buy what I consider "high end" nail polish.  And you know what?  It's OK by me. 

If someone gave me a gift card to Wal-Mart and told me to get a manicure, I would probably buy a book anyway.  Priorities, people!  :)